My feet hang off of the bed in the middle of the night. I’m taller then most people I know, including my husband, and I no longer notice it. People behind me in movie theatres usually move to another seat. It’s almost impossible to find jeans that are long enough. I can hide a extra 20 pounds on my body and you won’t find it. It’s nice to stand out in a crowd when someone is looking for you. Taller men make me feel uncomfortable when I have to look up to them. My feet are sized for a shorter person, I’m a size 9 1/2. I used to wear high heels all the time.
I always bang my knees under tables. Most car seats don’t go back far enough for my legs not to hit the steering wheel. Countertops are too low, but the upper cupboards fit perfectly, no step stool needed. Shower heads are somewhere near my shoulder. Tubs are too small to relax in. My Mom used to make me shop with her in the petite department, I was totally embarrassed.
The last person that asked me how the weather was up there, well lets say they won’t do it again. When I was a shy teenager, I hated to hear, “oh look how tall you are.” Really? I was the shortest person in my class in grade 3. It’s great to be tall, if you don’t mind clothes that are never long enough… other then that it’s great. We are who we are, tall, short, middle of the road. It took a lot of decades, but I wouldn’t give it up for anything. Are you at peace with your body, do you love it despite the things you might want to change?
I've got a friend who exquisitely files and organizes everything. From her silverware, and dishes, to her paperwork. She is the Martha Stewart of my life, so super organized she can put her finger onto anything you ask her to produce, dishes, documents, and the warranty for any appliance, no matter how old.
I admire her organizational skills, and part of me is asking? How do you do it? Did you learn it, where you born with this skill? Is there a class that I missed, did I misfile the ability somewhere between lost socks, and the cat demanding lunch at 10 am? I struggle to organize my thoughts, to be able to put them on the screen in a manner that is readable and interesting. We know it takes time to write a interesting blog post, and that good content takes effort. You've heard the phrase,"time expands to fill the space available" it's called Parkinson's law. The more time I have available the longer it takes to write my post. It can take me all day if I were to let it, and it won't be any more organized. Am I the only person this happens to? For me writing a blog post is similar to making dinner from scratch. I might start with p lans for homemade pasta, Alfredo sauce, broccoli, consider those the outline of my blog post. As I try to write down my thoughts the butter burnt, the cream curdled, and we ended up eating store bought pasta, and jarred sauce, with over cooked broccoli. It tasted OK, but it's wasn't what I had in mind when I began. Learning how to transfer the jumble in my mind onto the computer screen is one of the hardest things for me. The seat of your pants style of blogging has been my default for much too long, and I'm trying to improve by being more organized. Writing posts ahead of time still feels awkward, I'm still writing the night before, but I know that if I make something a good habit, it becomes much easier for me.
I'd like to be able to write a blog post in 20 minutes like this but I am far away from it. Sometimes I need to trick my brain into using organizational tricks to get things done in time. I've been using these and they seem to be working.
Writing standing up, sitting down encourages me to daydream, and we all know that it's wonderful.but not going to get that post written.
Setting a timer, the more time I have the longer it takes me to write my post.
Drafting out a post, writing a outline, going back and filling in the details afterwards.
Retyping awkward sentences in CAPITAL LETTERS. If I'm struggling with a word, I will just type it in caps so I can find it later and fix it.
Planning sheets from organized home they offer free printables, calendars, and to do lists that I've been using to organize my thoughts.
I'm in awe of bloggers who are able to write posts that flow effortlessly, the kind that make you wish you had written them. It's a journey, and each step we take to improve ourselves, brings us closer to being better bloggers. I need that on my wall…each step brings me further along my blogging journey… I'm always on the lookout for more organizational tips to help my blogging, so if you have any tips that help you organize your blog posts, please let me know in your comments.
The big move update: My move to Word Press is still a couple of weeks away, I've purchased my hosting, bought the Genesis framework, and picked a feminine theme I love. I'll let you know the exact date of the move when we get a little closer, things should stay almost the same on your end. I understand changes to our routines can be difficult, and I am hoping that you will hang out with me no matter what platform I'm on. I'm not changing who I am, or how I blog, what kind of shots I take, just where I do it. Laura from I'm so Vintage is going through the process of changing her blog name, and URL, she wrote a post describing it here. In the end, although changes might not be easy to go through, they help us grow in our blogging journeys. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed this post you might want to read this post also.
T he runners were all hyped up and ready to go, the excitement and anticipation of months of training reaching fever pitch. As the organizers counted down the seconds, you could feel the palpable tension amidst the..
81 runners. How many will make it?
Wait.
We're getting ahead of ourselves.
There's always a story behind the story. And isn't that the interesting part?
Prologue
Gingerbreadman with Gingerbread Driver, 4 pm Saturday.
GBM: Let's go to Libis, I need to buy a blinker from a bike shop.GBD: Okie ser! You go biking biking?GBM: Nope not biking, the blinker was just required for my race, it's at 1 am later.GBD: Ah! So you go biking biking at 1am? Dat is so eeshcary!GBM: We're not going biking, it's a run.GBD: Yes ser, biking run!GBM: No, I mean, running, two feet.GBD: Ah! JAGGING! Wow ish so erly por jagging ser! GBM: Quite a long jog indeed, about 50k .GBD: WAW! R U SERYOS SER??GBM: GBD, Magtagalog na lang tayo... GBD: Hay salamat ser! kamao pala kayo mag Tagalog!GBM: Teka, iba na un ah... .
Sleeplessly Anticipating
"Excitement" would be an understatement as I counted down the seconds, minutes, and hours before the single greatest challenge of my relatively nascent running career. During the time I was supposed to be sleeping, I was frozen in a zombie-like state. Everything seemed to be moving in freeze frame. I was glued to my laptop, the Takbo.ph shoutbox a looming rhapsody in motion, all but frozen in time. I was bored. Antsy. Couldn't sleep. And everytime I did try to sleep, the Gingerbread Dog was all over me. Bad dog. His birthday is coming up by the way, 2 years old this August 21. I'm planning a CLP and all of you are invited. Yeah. As I said, I'm antsy. Next paragraph please. Sorry for the 30 seconds of your life you'll never get back.
I'm just trying to help! HBD to mehhh! You're invited! 8/21!
Of Support Crews and the Ultimate Emperador Sacrifice On the path to fulfilling my dreams, I ran into a major obstacle - who the heck would support me? No way I could survive the distance without any form of help. My college friends are either getting married ( Note to self : Tick tock... . Tick Tock... ) or being stationed abroad. No way could they support me. I don't wanna hassle Gingerbread Gal, that's too long of a grind. So looks like I need to call on the last people on my list, the ones that I really didn't want to bother - the Gingerbread Dad and no less than internet legend/favorite uncle Tito Caloy. They had given up their commitment to support me on the journey, and Tito Caloy cancelled his Emperador LCLP with the kumpadres. Sob. Imagine, he gave that up for me? Must have been torn. Poignant moment right there.
GBM : Thanks for helping me out Dad.
GD : No problem son. I will just bring you there and meet you in the morning, am no spring chicken anymore . Tito Caloy will take over.
TC : Gigimik lang yan... ...
GBM : !!!!
TC: Gano tayo katagal dun?
GBM: Max of 9 hours?
TC: May chicks ba dun?
GBM: !!!!!
Gingerbread Dad and internet Legend Tito Caloy all set
Official Gingerbread Support Car
Yellow Cab, 11:20 pm Saturday
I am nervous. Really. I mean, I am gunning to run a distance that I have never tackled before, not even close. A lot of people would not subscribe to that. But hey that's just me. It would kill me if I didn't try. Classic Gingerbread hard-headedness there. Meeting place is Yellow Cab Julia Vargas and the two elder Gingerbread folk are early. Early but... . they ordered a Pizza! Whaaa? It's 11:30 already! We might be late! Gingerbread Dad bought like 40 Gatorade bottles along with oreos, chocolates, and ... pizza. You'd think we were going on a children's party or something instead of an ultramarathon. Children.. hmm. Just made me remember a conversation with Gingerbread Mom over the phone while chilling from her lofty perch.
GBM: Yes Mom I'm running a 50k ultramarathon. I may even go for 100 if I'm still alive.
GM: Aww that's so great son!
GBM: Uh, yeah? It's running from UP to Commonwealth then SM Fairview then retrace the whole thing back to UP! It's a big deal you know! I'll be famous!
GM: Awww that's wonderful! How long will you be away?
GBM: I'll be running for 8, 9 hours straight! Very few runners are crazy enough to do it!
GM: Wow, very nice! Very nice! Make sure you won't run come nightfall it's dangerous!
GBM: Ugh, its at 1am Mom.
GM: Well then make sure you're home in time for lunch! It's Sunday and you rarely go here! Take care! Do you have money?
GBM: (The way our conversation is running you would think I'm just going out to the mall to watch a movie or something. Old people. What fun. )
Starting Line , 12:59 am
T he runners were all hyped up and ready to go, the excitement over the culmination of weeks and months of training reaching fever pitch. As the organizers counted down the seconds, you could feel the palpable tension amidst the crowd. There was a definitive buzz. Neville and Ian had given last minute instructions, car stickers and banners already distributed. Class pictures were taken. Niceties were exchanged among the brave souls, a pall of both uncertainty and anticipation slowly falling over the group. 81 have come to defy the odds and enter the hard-knocks, no-frills world of the ultramarathon. As the starting gun went off and the group started going en masse past the utilitarian starting line banner, you get to think... how many of them would be here to cross the finish?
Newbies getting tips from the ultra vets
Sir Ronnie aka Runnerforchrist and Takbo.ph running bud Doc Sherwin pre-race
They will keep us safe
Pat's lucky charm
Race directors par excellance Ian and Neville for last-minute instructions
The starting line beckons... .
Kilometer 10, 2:10 am. What's the Rush?
Amidst the helter skelter start, me and TNF 100 vet/ Takbo.ph buddy Pat were left bundled together for the first 10km of the run. For some insane reason , we thought we were way behind the pack. And for an even more insane reason, we ran the first 10k in 70 mins. Apparently, for runners of our skill level, that is tantamount to a virtual death knell in ultra terms. As you see the story unravel, the implications of such a brazen move would have significant ramifications on the two of us as the race wore on.
I can do this...
The bunny is the key
The 1st and 2nd placers of GIG Run pose for a bit
Km 11 - 20 , 3 am. The Endless Roads of Commonwealth Ave.
The route looped back to base camp at Ylanan before we set out to go to Commonwealth. I was starting to think that this breakneck pace was not prudent at all if I was to go the distance. So I signaled to Pat to leave me behind. As I went out to Commonwealth, I realized that the road to success would be a solitary one.
Mundane sights on a road that doesn't end The very same route I have traversed endless times in the past by car didn't seem like it would end. An interesting twist was that I had to pass by the Quezon CIty circle as well, going through the overpass twice.
The sight that greets tired wannabe ultramarathoners I never realized that thing was that long. Once you had completed that part, you would be passing what seemed like a never ending road. Twists along the way - Tito Caloy finally tracked me down, gave much needed support. I was expecting him to look sheepish or bored to death, but he looked genuinely concerned. Naks. Scene after Tito Caloy had given me some much-needed refreshments :
Unknown Oldie Runner : May tubig ka b a diyan? Tito Caloy : Ah, eh, meron UOR : Pahingi naman TC: Ah, eh, cge eto UOR: Gatorade meron? TC: Um, oo, pero... .. UOR: Pahingi na din. Baon. Malayong bakbakan to. TC: !!! GBM:!!!
(runner speeds off)
TC: You're welcome! GBM: What the fudge was that all about?
Sight for sore legs
Generous Guy Tito Caloy having a drink. No not that kind. Along Commonwealth I also repeatedly ran into veteran ultra dude Kiko (who actually went on to finish the 100k. Kept on offering him an Oreo or Gatorade. Or something. Refused every time. "I'm good, thank you." Classy, nice guy. Ultra Marathon tips on-the-go that I got from him :
1. Walk the inclines. Always. Don't even think about it. 2. You should have no injuries or funky feelings at the 50k mark. If you do, don't even think about it. 3. Eat real, whole meals. Planning on eating Oreos and chocolates the whole time? Don't even think about it.
Sage advice from ultra vet Kiko helped me surviveI took his advice to heart... . thus I ended up not thinking at all :)
Km 22 - 30 , 530 am. The long uphill to SM Fairview.
Upon reaching the very end of Commonwealth and hitting the turn to SM Fairview, evil voices in my head were slowly picking on my psyche in the dark solitude of that fateful Sunday morning.
You gotta be crazy dude. This is a route that BUSES take. You are so far off. You're alone. It's so dark you could get mugged. In your excitement to maintain an "ultra pace" your friends are at least an hour ahead of you. You're slow. Just quit and get back to your pampered , softie lifestyle. Go... go ride your support car and go home to Daddy.
Thankfully, I did my best to tune out these thoughts that would make Norman Vincent Peale turn in his grave. And Tito Caloy was resolute in not letting me rot on the road. He would show up every 10k or so, and just the mere sight of someone to talk to would sustain reanimate me. Thank God, he didn't desert me! Blood is thicker than alcohol! I've been running for nearly 5 hours straight already. Must not quit. Just as I was completely losing my sanity, I ran into the group of veteran ultraman and Takbo.ph buddy Ronald. Was a big group, and we ended up pacing until the aid station at SM Fairview where cold water and camote nourished us. The last sigh of fresh air before the final push. Its much akin to that slight lull before the Battle of Helm's deep in LOTR.
SM Fairview will never look the same again
Brief respite before the final push Km 30 onwards. What happened??
The events of what happened from this point on were all a blur to me. It's like a lucid dream. A real, live one (to the younger readers, kindly google "Vanilla Sky"). Essentially, the absurdity of a quick start combined with running for what was to eventually be eight hours began to catch up with me. Laundry list of what happened to me until the finish line :
Cramped up both legs at 35k mark
Knees tightened at 37k mark
Couldn't run well at 37k mark
Lost Tito Caloy until QC Circle Part Deux. He was ensnared in a running conversation with an old lady along Fairview on magnets (huh?) and he couldn't extricate himself. Ugh.
Was escorted by two scooters at 35 k mark. Seriously thought I was the very last runner. For someone who takes solace in the fact that he cracked the top 60 of his last 10k race, this was a terrible blow to the psyche that added exponentially to the mental strain he was already going through
Ipod went dead at 40k
Voices in head became louder at 40k
Saw Mcdonald's icon Grimace running in front of him at 41k mark
9. Openly considered quitting at 41k after seeing Grimace 10.Became fast friends with two gentlemen of an advanced age who were ditching the 100k ultra because they couldn't go on any further . Sakit ng tiyan ko hijo, masakit! 11.Quick fist pump at 42k mark. First full marathon. Wohoo! Oh great 8k more to go 12.Received encouraging phone calls from Takbo.ph pals Rico, Rod and Edu at 42 mark, reviving me from a semi-comatose state 13.Decided with finality that shooting for a 100k would land me in the hospital. I need the money from my job. Hospital would TAKE money I don't have away from me. Easiest choice I ever made. 14.Tito Caloy gives encouraging advice to call it a day with a smile. 15.Met by the most raucous ovation one could ever ask for at the 45k mark from the Takbo.ph family. I almost cried. Oh wait hold the tears. 5 more kilometers to go. 16.Bromance partner Rico aka Sheer Will paced me for the longest 5k of my life. Would possibly wilted if I was alone. 17.Best finish of my relatively nascent running career - screaming friends, a medal, parent and fun uncle in the crowd. Tons of cameras clicking away. With the racket going on you would think I won the damn thing. Felt like a gazillion bucks.
Eternally grateful for the 5k push
A final, painful run for glory
Happy Gingerbread Dad
Tito Caloy comes through for the Gingerbread Clan
It was all worth it... .
Because of these guys and gals
So there. Whew. That's my story. A dichotomy that unraveled as the layers of my soul were stripped down to its barest, purest form. A guy who yearns to be on top of the list ends up on the bottom. One who yearns to be fast ended up taking it very slow. Who went through the entire journey in independent solitude, only to rely on the kindness and thoughtfulness of others in order to finish.
I came in to test my limits, to prove that the mental faculties of an individual trump the physical every time. I came in with a chip on my shoulder, to show that I have the ability to go over and beyond what people expect of me. I came in... . with lofty expectations.
81 hopefuls. 47 made it. In the end, when everything was said and done, amidst the warm company of family and friends...
I was just so happy to be there and savor the moment with them.
There's always a story behind a story. Isn't that the interesting part?
Confession time. I have never completed a full marathon before. Not even close. As a newbie, my ambition has led me to so many different avenues that I would never, ever, would have considered seven months ago. At the time, a 5k would have been a major coup. Heck, I was 30 lbs. overweight. I needed to DO something. Some months and minor successes later, here I am on the cusp of a potential life experience. I signed on for the Botak 50k ultramarathon. Yeah, crazy guy. Jumping to an ultra without doing a full mary. Not too many people knew this.So the secret's out. But hey, we only live once right? I wanted to do Milo but I'm out on official business on the 5th. So this would have been my last shot at testing my limits for the next couple of months. So why would a guy who has done 35k max try to pull this off? Why would you thrown caution to the wind when people say it cannot be done? Let us see how the story unravels.
What chain of events led to this?
A place of no limits
I teach a module to students called "The Drive To Succeed", a class that handles how to go past any obstacles from a marketing and sales management perspective. It tackles how the human mind can overrule any obstacle, be it physical or mental. It's a good ploy to get students past paralyzing stage fright when presenting. It teaches them to be hotwired to succeed.To be stubborn, resilient, and driven when common sense would dictate that it cannot be done. Now, I'm thinking, can these theories be harnessed to pull of the impossible? Can I use these powers of the mind and make the big jump?
The 100k flirtation
As crazy as running a 50k was, my crazy side was ignited after attending the Botak CLP . Watching slides of Botak founder Cesar Guarin traverse insane distances led me to openly declare my intention to try and pull it off. Wrong idea. Adjectives to describe the reactions from friends and family -disdain, disgust, wariness, exasperation, anger. But hey, that's why they're called friends and family. They care for you and your well-being. They argue with you to death and roast you. But in the end, even if they don't agree with you, you could still be assured of their unwavering support. That's the beauty of it. So okay, it's a stretch. A big one. But I told myself that if I were still alive at the 50k mark, if I could so much as walk, I'll go for it. As it turns out, running distances that you usually take a car for was much harder than I could conceivably imagine.
