“Hello, front desk,
Mother Natures hotel?” Yes, it’s Jane, I’d like to cancel my 5 am wakeup call please.”… “You know the one with the Male Pheasant trilling loudly as he sails across our front lawn to the bird feeder, and the crows having a fight outside our bedroom window every morning with the ravens.” Yes, that one, the one that starts at 5 am every morning, before it even gets light outside.
"It’s not that we don’t love all of the wildlife here, it’s beautiful, but the brochure definitely stated that the countryside was peaceful and quiet, and it’s not turning out that way.
Ah ha… right I see. “So you are saying that it’s going to take 8 months until it can be cancelled… mmhhh hhhhm. I see, so it will be Fall before it stops.” “May I speak to your supervisor please.”
“Hello, yes I’m speaking to? Oh Mother Nature… I see, the um the big boss. Well Mother Nature, I would like to cancel my 5 am wakeup call, you see we didn’t sign up for this part of country living, and your overly enthusiastic employee is refusing to cancel our wakeup calls until the Fall, and he keeps tapping on the phone.… and… but… um… ” “Yes, I realize that he’s a woodpecker… I hear him pounding on the tree outside all day long, maybe you could consider hiring someone else to do the receptionist job… ”
“No, I realize the eagles didn’t work out very well, yes we noticed the missing dove, and we were very upset about that… I understand that you can’t get good staff now a days… the younger generation and all that is hatched. Too busy flitting about eating all the time.yes I understand.” “Now about our wake up call? Mother Nature? Helloooooo, hello?”