So you read the previous post 5 tips on how not to sell your house. Trust me, it’s all true, and I’ve got more to share with you. Some readers were asking if it was all true, yes every last bit of it are experiences that we have just recently had while on our house hunting searches. Oh, and there is more. Let me tell you about the “cranky lady house.” We arrived at the house and got out of the car. Our Realtor [who deserves a medal for politeness while under fire] knocked on the door as she always does before entering. The door was opened by a women with no eyebrows who exclaimed “you're too early!” Now the tone of her voice was sharp, and nasty. She actually told us to drive around the block for 15 minutes until the “correct time.” Chastised we piled back into the car and drove around, I was feeling rather rebellious, and suggested not going back at all, but we did, and she was gone the second time. With it being a buyers market, you would think that she might have been a little nicer, and a bit politer. There’s tip #6 in how not to sell your home.
We had a guy who was conducting a business meeting at the kitchen table, while his Son, and their enormous dog greeted us at the door. When you are expecting a empty house, and you are greeted by a dog/horse at the door, and some guy giving stock quotes over the phone, it’s hard to really get into the layout of the house. We left as soon as it was polite. Tip #7 get out of the house, take the dog/horse to the neighbours. Tip #8 is a easy one, take down the creepy Halloween decor after the end of October. Our trip to visit this potential home was rather surprising, the outside was lovely, quiet, and nicely landscaped. But go through the front door and there in the foyer, was a antique wooden chair hanging from a oversized black butcher hook. As if that wasn’t enough, there was a old wooden coffin in the shed outside. Our very brave Realtor actually opened it to see if anything was inside, nope empty. The downstairs had bedroom doors painted black with giant tigers on them. And the clincher that this property wasn’t for us… the “grow op” wiring in the wall that had been duct taped over. Turns out they claimed it was for a summer kitchen, ah ha, in the bedroom? Be honest, this is tip #9. We saw a lovely house built on the hillside. It showed beautifully, clean as a whistle, and the owner even baked cookies to give it that lived in feeling. She told us that she had just dropped the price. That wasn’t all that was dropping. Things didn’t deteriorate until you took a walk in the bedrooms. As we progressed across the room, we got the feeling of going downhill. At first glance everything seemed fine, it wasn’t until we crossed the room and looked back that we realized we were several inches lower. Yes, the lovely cookie smelling house was sinking down the hill.
The cute little house in town was adorable, nice yard, and as we opened the front door, the soccer game blaring out of the wide screen TV shouted, and announced every move. Unable to find the volume control we toured the house wishing we could concentrate, and left. Tip # 10 the background noise you choose can influence your buyers. Choose wisely, obviously not all of us are into foreign soccer games.
I’ve seen rotting window sills filled with dead insects, dirty floors, unpatched walls, dust bunnies galore, and I am sure that the journey isn’t over yet. And I know that all the Febreeze in the world won’t disguise a smokers house, nor will a slap dab of paint cover a hole in the wall. It’s pretty amazing what some sellers consider clean, and presentable. But on the other hand, don’t forget there are some amazingly beautiful staged houses out there. One person even Christmas wrapped all of her paintings to give the home a jaunty seasonal look. It’s a journey, come along for the ride, our dream home is out there somewhere.