You know that you are in the middle of a reno when:
- You reach for a wooden spoon to stir the soup, and don’t even notice it’s a crowbar.
- You get out of bed with a hop skip and a jump. That’s hop, over the laundry basket full of tools, skip, around the pile of flooring, jump, through the drywall leaned up against the door.
- The cat comes in with white paws, his were black, but now they are coated in dust from the wet saw, in fact everything outside is white, and it’s not snow.
- You no longer jump, or even notice when a loud bang is followed by “oh ******”.
- You are getting rather used to writing the words “One thousand, and…” on a cheque, you’re getting great practice.
- Your heart no longer drops at the workman's call of “ah you had better come see this.” you know from experience it isn’t something good, nor is it a million dollars hidden in the walls.
- You find that tools make great clothes hangers, after all they aren’t being used, due to the latest “you had better come see this.”
- Your plumber is spending the month in Hawaii, all expenses paid…by you.
- You wash every dish, and piece of cutlery before using it, sawdust is everywhere, including in your underwear.
- The greeter at your local big box hardware store calls you by your first name, and thanks you for the raise he received.
- You know the names of the tools, and what they are used for. In fact, you can now reinstall a dishwasher in 30 seconds flat, but it still remains broken.
- You ask for tools for Valentines day, and you know which ones you want.
- You thought it would all be over in a week, now you know better.
- You just smile and nod politely when friends tell you it will all be worth it in the end.
- End? There will be no end.
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