I’ve been blogging for over 5 years now, and compared to those who seem to start a blog, gather followers like a polished table gathers dust, look back after 6 months to say that they have experienced so much, that may sound like a long time. And it was, it is, but it’s bad to compare, so I don’t, and the time has gone by fast. Blogging is such a personal journey, some roads are rockier, and have less sign posts then others. It’s about the journey, not the sprint. Looking through my blog archives for something the other day forced me to read some old posts… I cringe. Of course I debate should I take them out, or leave them? One day it’s hit the delete button and fast, the next it’s no, it’s a record of events in my life, maybe I’ll read them and cringe another time. Writing a personal blog that evolves is both a blessing, and a embarrassment, you think to yourself, look how far I’ve come, my photography, and writing skills have improved, my voice is becoming clearer, focused, there is a pathway appearing. And then I read some of those old posts… and I blush.
Why on earth did I choose to write that? What was I talking about? Rambling, unfocused, jumping from subject to subject, trying to be all for everyone. Let’s just pretend that I didn’t do that, OK?
But I realize it’s part of the process, my voice getting stronger, growing, sharpening the vision of whom, and what I want to be when I grow up. I’m not there yet, but I am moving towards it. Evolving. I write what I feel, sharing how I see my world around me. I am influenced by so many things, yet can’t share everything, my boundaries may shift slightly, but they are definite. I write from the heart, and that can’t be forced, I write in the voice that I am feeling at the time of the post. It’s got to come when it does, and I should be grateful that it shows up.
It’s a fine line of wanting more depth to a post, and not embarrassing myself in public. The most popular posts are those that are written about a moment, an emotion, feelings, or a experience. Be it funny, sad, bothersome, or just a moment of beauty… it’s from the heart. And I don’t mind sharing that at all.my voice, my heart, this is one blogger who is finding it slowly, but surely. I write, you respond, and oh how you teach me by what you say in your comments. I’m being me to the best of my ability, and it’s all I can be.
Slowly blooming, or not. I thank you for coming along for the ride.
If you think that the layout of this post looks a little wonky, you are most likely right…I've signed up for Google 2 step verification passwords, and lo, and behold, windows live writer will no longer let me sign in. I found that out just as I was about to publish this post…so for now, unless someone has a suggestion, I am being forced to write this in Blogger's version.